*Some of this post has been borrowed from my other site, Slightly Tilted Life.
Two things about me you may not realize:
- I have a brain. I have proof of this.
- Not only do I have a brain, it’s a little too big for my head.
I have what is called a chiari (key-r-e) malformation. I like the name. I mean, if I’m going to have a malformation, at least the name is fun to say and it’s kind of pretty. It’s not like “grotesque gnarled horned knee malformation” or anything. Basically, it means my cerebellar tonsils are too long and crowd the foramen magnum that the brain stem passes through. This causes me some issues. Insomnia. Chronic fatigue. Klutziness. (Yay! I have an actual reason for this!) Dizziness. Numb fingers. Headaches. Depression. Cellulite. (The cellulite is not scientifically proven, but I swear it’s related.)
Anyway, it’s not really rare, but it is uncommon. There isn’t a “cure” for it, but most people that are symptomatic – like me – may be a candidate for surgery.
So…yay. I’m having brain surgery in May.
I’m 95% cool with this and 5% terrified. Sometimes these percentages flip flop. Maybe even multiple times a day. Or an hour. Or within seconds of each other.
While I don’t want to minimize the seriousness of the surgery, I don’t want to make it a big deal, either. We all have our “thing” or “things” that we deal with – this is just my thing right now.
So…why even bring it up at all? Well, for several reasons.
First, I have several businesses and have put some other things on hold for a bit. Since I have to let people know what’s going on, I’d rather address it personally. Also, it’s hard to find information on this condition from a person that is going through it daily, having the surgery, and then letting people know how the recovery process went for them. If I can help one person by telling a little bit about it, that’s a good enough reason for me.
Secondly, I need prayers. I really do. I don’t need people to look at me, think “poor thing”, tell me they’ll pray for me, and then forget all about it. I don’t want pity. I want prayers. I need guidance to make the right decision about this and to accept whatever God’s will is for my life. I don’t know what His purpose is for this, but I know that he has one and I don’t want to waste an opportunity to be a better person. I need prayers that my family will not kill me during my recovery and that he’ll give them lots of patience, energy, and superhuman cleaning abilities. Pray hard for this.
Thirdly, we all go through something. We ALL do. We ALL need support and prayers. Just being able to say out loud what your problem is and what help you need to get through it makes your burden a little less. The problem becomes more bearable because you have the support of people around you. And if someone needs your help, help them. The best way to solve your “thing” can often be helping someone else with their “thing”. (For the rest of this article, click here.)
My plan is to post a little bit weekly about this so that others with this issue won’t feel alone or like their symptoms are all in their head…which they are, technically, but you know what I mean.
Talk with you soon!